Friday 25 April 2014

Flat Fridee

Wonka here.  We got up in the end.  it is another grey drizzle ridden, dismal ridden misty ridden morning which has kept on going.  Somehow good folks out there possibly having better weather than us, we got up to it.  And who is looking through the window but Bertie.  IN THIS WEATHER goes Owner who is still half asleep.  I did look at him through the window and said words to the effect of: there is a good luxury shed out back with a good degree of shelter why are you on the steps in the cold and wet?  But he couldn't hear me above the double glazing although Owner says it is not specially good double glazing and may need replacing.  by the landlady.  Yes.  Bertie you say?  he is very timid and afraid but did venture in (that word) as far as the good kitchen doormat for a big bowl of breakfast.  We love him.


Fresh and flat para.  What is this Flat business you wonder.  Owner has traipsed through this grey and dark day and says quote I FEEL FLAT.  So I have adjusted the setting to FLAT SETTING.  What is this down to you further wonder. or wonder further.  (list) 1.  going back to her job that isn't even saving us from starving. 2. coming back here from Cornwall 3.  Being tired and tired of being tired (says) 4.  Ronnie O Sullivan my hero and Owner's too is 2 frames down in his match with Joe Perry.  Point 4 is pretty serious good folks out there as Ronnie has got to win because of Owner's pending (like it) trip to the Crucible Theatre in Sheffield next Satdee for the semi final.  And she is fully expecting Ronnie to be in it.  We have been glued to the snooker since Ronnie been on the green baize and it is hard to think of anything else.  But, for our photoshoot we did promise one of Bertie and here is the cartoon: I am flying it up top but there he is at the bottom left hand corner peeking through the good gate.  I love him.

Still pretty flat para.  Now Mr Beaujangles managed to call 2 minutes before Owner set off to the job that isn't quite doing it.  DILEMMA she goes.  This is because (cliffhanger) Owner has made it her mission to de worm him.  All I have to do she goes to me (I was fast asleep on the giant nest stroke settee) is dab this on the back of his neck.  This seems easy but Owner said she could not find any skin handy beneath his fur. (I slept on) In the end she just dabbed it on his neck and left him chomping a massive dish of pretend turkey and chicken to run out the door to that job.  BE GOOD WONKA she said (but I was dreaming and the next thing I knew she was at the good front door with fresh supplies).  Of course I made it look like I had been on Mr Beau watch all the time (Don't let him by the front door Wonka! warned Owner.  I mean how do I stop him?  lay across it??).  I praised her for buying some new biscuits to go with the other ten tons of dried food we have to choose from so she didn't notice I had just got up and Mr Beau was settled under the bed.  I LOVE THAT ONE I went and even Mr Beau had a peck at them too.    We love him.

Last final and flat para.  Will Owner come round you all want to know.  The jury is out good folks as Ronnie is trailing as we speak.  But said Owner if anyone can turn it round he can.  Now last night we watched a lot of things, from Enders and weeping and wailing plus anger from Ian, yes.  he has thrown out that girl who we forgot her name but it is Cindy.  Saint Jane and Denise are rallying round and all the square are suspects.  it is bearable says Owner, just about.  We look forward to Corrie x 2 and more love trysts, double dealings and will Anna and Owen make it through the night.  And surely Steve cannot keep a big secret.  Tracy has proposed marriage and the boy said yes!  It is all happening and if it takes Owner's mind off the snooker which is nail biting (she says) I will not complain.  Now do go steady out there in the Wold good folks wherever you are in it, as we approach the weekend.  And more snooker.  Big Love Wonka x

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