Sunday, 27 December 2015

The Day After!

HALLOA UP!!! we all slept in zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz me included because we are worn out with festivities.

Did Owner get through yesterdee alright you all ask up full of anxiety and wotnot. ??????
After I shoved her out the best front door I could only hope and pray OH and eat a few more biscuits, check on Bertie and zzzzzz.
When she swam I mean trotted back in hours later she had this to report up:

There it is!!! the car with no name............... Owner reports that she left here in good cheer having done the manoeuvre of her life to get out of a very tight parking up. WHOEVER parked up that close to me deserves glhhsu7gngho!!!! she told me up.
THEN WHAT OWNER?? I asked up (yes it was smack on topping up time.x)
First up she says something (??) banged into her side wing mirror and it folded up in protest. I STOPPED the car and fixed it she says. OH. Then she is trundling on nicely and the car in front brakes and starts swimming for its life. OH I says up full of interest as suddenly it is interesting. So the car with no name swam too!!!
I DIDN'T KNOW IT COULD SWIM she says full of  admiration and such like. it turns out it had to swim a bit further up the river I mean road, and coming home there was a giant diversion. We love a diversion, and owner followed it faithfully and came out 2 yards further up the river I mean road.  This folks, is the sign of a good diversion.  it should never take you too far away from where you started.  End of.
Folks it didn't end there, as when she finally parked up nicely (I watched it folks and I can tell you it was a champion park up.x) she lifted the giant christmas carrier full of gifts from Daughter out of the swimmer car with no name, and the bottom fell out.
ALL THE PRESENTS sat on the wet pavement.  At the same time, she tells me (is there an end in sight yes there is.) the piece of chewing gum she had put somewhere sensible so it didn't stick to her new and beauty gloves stopped being sensible and stuck to the beauty leather gloves.  The neighbour who we didn't like anyway walked past Owner and did not offer to help.  LUCKILY Wonka, I had another carrier bag that wasn't a Christmas one, but it stepped up.  AND, I didn't like that neighbour anyway. NOR ME, I said back being a faithful and loyal cat especially when it is smack on tea time. x
SURELY you all say as one, the string of disasters stopped there?  nearly folks.  We just had to endure the ribbon snapping off Owner's best dressing gown but after a few sherries it simply didn't matter.
Me and Bertie and Rug?  had the best boxing day ever, with real chick pretend chick, biscuits and wall to wall tv.  We especially liked a hitherto (blimey) and unknown film called 'One Chance' with three stars and all about an opera singer who got on Brits got Talent and won it. HOW inspiring droned Owner. next up we got through Dickensian which I loved and if Owner says one more time where is Bullseye I may get a tiny claw out...... we ended up with:
And then there were none which is the most fab Agatha Christie's evah.end of. Fact. XXXX And Owner says she wouldn't mind being on the Island with thingy (it is alright I checked his name out it is Aidan Turner.X) We are hoping for more of the same today washed down with sherry (Owner) and zzzzzz (me) any food whatsoever (Bertie) and the back door open annoying all (Rug).
Have a day filled with wonderment yourselves! big Love Wonka X