Saturday, 30 July 2016

What's Going On?

HALLOAH UP! brave folks all around this wonderful alright sometimes wicked world............. HERE I AM with your weekly mash up.  Owner said not to use that phrase so I am.  end of.X

What's going on but just about everything folks.  first UP, there is news of yet another feline in the downing street line up courtesy I can reveal to you, of Battersea cat and dog home. HUGE TICK. Called Gladstone. small tick. Will it get on with Larry and Palmerston who are already there you all wonder up?  in a word. NYET, NON, NADA. (?)....as you know in this house we are all very dysfunctional and proud of it.X
 
There we are!!! In another dream ridden and ideal existence we would all sit round together and share furry stories INSTEAD we are all separate and have our own special hidey places and boxes ectc.  End of and anti-everything feline facts up.X
 
In other news and what is going on with (list).
 
1.  Owner's mood setting.  This has veered from alright to frankly anxiety ridden and fretful.  As this is quite normal I am not concerned.  not a bit of it, and I like it under the bed anyway.X
 
2.  Owner's hair.  This is the success story of the week.  for some reason, it has gone right.  The hairdresser, who is a roving one, arrived, did the biz and left a very happy head of hair.  I like it, Owner loves it, and the rest of the world knows no different.X
 
3.  The political mess we are in.  This continues to shape up nicely with us cats who all voted to REMAIN sneering and hissing at those who put their tick in the WRONGBOX.  Bertie is particularly set against it, but is sticking to his routine despite it all.  Ruggles is keeping a strong eye outback for the wave of promised felines all trying to move into his luxury shed, but so far - it seems YET ANOTHER FICTION.  Me?  thanks for asking, keeping a beady eye on the finances which are DWINDLING faster than a brexit promise.X 
 
There he is!! Ruggles stationed at the good back gate.X
 
4.  The Labour party.  Who? you all shout up nervous now that a new party has sprung up without you noticing.  NO it is the same one, split by the ones who love Jezzer (not us. NO) and the ones who are warming to the welsh laddie Owen. (US) all you need to remember folks that the Plantagenet dynasty (like that word a lot.) was ousted by a hitherto unknown lad ...............(small roll on the drums building to a loud crescendo!) OWEN TUDOR  which is more or less like saying Owen Smith. He is making a bid for the leadership and our money is all over it.  what pennies we have left now that Owner is NOT working or doing much.X
 
5.  US of A.  Good king Obama has given a rousing speech for the new candidate Hillary with two ELLS, BUT wait - we thought we could not love Queen Michelle anymore but now we do!! She is fab and inspiring and Owner says she is her new and latest role model.
 
Just what is Owner doing then you all want to know half way through your Satdees.  not a lot folks.  As I say, I have tried to motivate her into writing and drawing AND I have had some success.  The proof read whizzed off to good Austin Macauley publishers, and she has even - with my help folks - got to the end of TWO yes TWO new stories.  Conversations with Wonka part seven is coming your way soon.XX (a preview of the Cover is coming your way shortly.X)
 
6.  I haven't mentioned the Tory party, Boris, Tresa's shoes, interest rates (not interesting.x) and I'm not going to.  End of.X
 
But listen up folks, the bags have come out and I fear a weekend away is on the cards.  She has said those immortal words IT'S NOT FOR LONG Wonka.  I know. And, she has been buying flip flops.  Not one pair but three. IN CASE I FALL she explained to me tossing the old ones in the bin.  What could I say back folks?  We cannot have another incident where I might be CRUSHED by Owner tripping or stepping back into nothing can we??
 
Telly wise we are now stuck like aroldite (Owner's Dad's fave glue. personally I would change it for a tube that didn't split and glue your fingers together but Owners will not change.) to Game of Thrones.  Tyrion or whatever his little name is, is our bestest in it and we hate Joffrey like mad.  And his mad mother. Somehow we have kept up with Corrie and Dave's loss (Kylie stabbed outside the kebab shop) and Leanne's news (babe to Steve who is married to michelle.  I know.X) AND celebrity masterchef.....we fell in love with Jiminee Osmond who was so happy and gentle AND can sing.X
 
Do have a wonderful week ahead folks full of dreams come true and good fur days.  BIG LOVE Wonka X