Saturday, 20 May 2017

Giving up is not for us!

WHAT IS THIS WONKA! you all mutter up, meaning to say HAS OWNER CAVED IN AND RUN AWAY TO SCOTLAND???

Has she heck as like as Steve would say in Corrie but to be fair folks, and you know that is my middle name or is it FUR!!!!   to be fair, she has had plenty to run away about. (LIST. you know you love our LISTS.X)
1.  No one that is PERSONNE believed her about aged sibling's lost munney. It has caused a lot of upset especially when Owner went all detective a la prime suspect and said who took it!! The nice policeman wrote it all down and said things like - we are talking about damage limitation.  I know X
2.  I did tell Owner not to make that phone call, the one where she went hysterical and called everyone very stupid (although it is the watershed I cannot repeat what she really said.X) it is alright though as all think she is a bit mad anyway (don't forget folks she does not bother to proof read this diary thingie so I am in the clear.x)
3. She has not heard back from anyone at the good publishers Austin Macauley to explain why NO ONE or PERSONNE has heard of or is reading our fab stories. And this despite a million emails folks!!

 

 
 
 
Here we are folks!! this is our very latest story self published on #amazonkindle - it is entered into a big fat competition and if we win it I will personally eat all those biscuits up yes those ones that I usually leave for ruggles.X BUT it does not have to win the competition JUST YOUR HEARTS!!!! X
 
Somehow Owner staggered to the end of a horrid week only weeping here and there and only shouting at other drivers A LOT. I am just grateful Wonka, she droned to me, that they cannot hear what I am swearing I mean saying.X
 
Me? thanks for asking, I have done myself proud, going OUTSIDE into real outback breathing in real sea air and sniffing every single leaf and weed growing in a pot.  As for that gnome I KNEW YOU WERE A GNOME.X
 
Ruggles has been darting here and there laying on Owner's Dad's bench outback and pretending he knows it all.  Bertrude has got under my paws a couple of times but mostly just hissed in my face.X
 
I turn round for two seconds and this silly old diary publishes itself, DOH.  What I meant to report on was the silly old election debate where silly old Tresa Grey stopped at home and as for Jezzer I dare say he was on a rally somewhere.  BUT folks, it gave those pesky Greens a chance to shine and we love them!x  In telly world we have clung to Corrie and poor Bethanee will she get rescued from horrid thingie who she is engaged to.  Feelan is still getting away with murder and Nick is suspicious of everyone but the babe who isn't his.  I know.X  Enders has spun off into food bank land and Witnee has gone on a spending spree with NO MUNNEY and Mick has said he will never leave her again. I know.X  There were other programmes to watch but with Owner's attention span whittling down to half a second at best, it has to be FAST and GOOD if you see what I mean.X
 
Now surely this coming week which is Owner's last week at college (how she will miss those smartphone addicted students X) must be an improvement on last? and if it isn't folks that escape plan to Scotland is BACK ON!! cat carrier alert!! Seriously folks, sleek down that fur tell yourself you look THE BIZ and jump and down on anyone who tells you different!  Big Love Wonka X