Wonka here. Two words: Quasimodo and Raj. What is that you all say? it is the names of Owner's two garden gnomes, and the most recent one is named after the famous whistle blower who according to her is called Raj Mattu. We hope in advance he does not mind this naming. What if he does I said to Owner. and she goes (list 1.) it is highly unlikely Wonka that he reads your good blog. 2. It can only raise his profile in a good way (I did say how is that by comparing a highly skilled heart surgeon to a gnome sitting on a log but she didn't hear me above telling me the third point.) 3. He would see the funny side of it, a gnome that does a wolf whistle when you walk past him. yes I said, only if his batteries are switched on Owner and she goes JUST LIKE A HEART WITH SOME IN IT! I really do think that long drive has affected her but I mustn't say too much as not had my tea yet.
Fresh para in celebration of world Earth Day. You will all be quite keen now to see the new gnome and here he is: He's a small little fellow in keeping with his gnome status and Quasi (after the hunchback. Yes, and the connection there good folks is his watering can.) is just over to his right. Owner said not to switch him on for now as he may frighten Ruggles, or Mr Beau, or Bertie, or Tinkers. RIGHTO I said. yes I am very busy keeping stock of everyone out there just now, not least Bertie who used to be on silent setting but has found his voice and kept up a fairly constant miaow last night and this morning. I quite love him. Tmro there may be a cartoon of him said Owner who is spoilt for cartoons and photoshoots after her little breakaway. And talking of breaks we have remembered the world champ snooker is on and have the green baize table on the tv. DON'T FORGET goes Owner, I have a ticket to the semi final at the Crucible! How can I forget good folks out there when Owner is already pondering on, not who she will watch on that day, no, it is all about her, she is saying things like what shall I wear I want to be comfy but smart. I love her.
Final Earth to Owner para. Today we have spent catching up. What with you say? With what we missed. We did watch Corrie and Maria has not coughed up her texting folly to Tyrone. He is none the wiser but guess who knows all about it but David the bad boy of the street. No good can come of it goes Owner wisely. Teena is all of a sudden a mary poppins stroke confidante stroke barmaid supreme so it is no wonder that her downfall is sealed in cement goes Owner again very wisely and Steve who normally cracks jokes and is a bit of a buffoon has gone a bit sinister. he spoke up to Teena from the gloom of the back of the Rovers in the little arbour where all smoke their heads off and have trysts. Compared to this darkness, Enders and missing Lucee seemed a bit Enid Blyton as we traipse through the contenders in this latest whodunit. Owner is more interested in who was in the coffin that Dot cried over as it was not nasty nick. And why is the coffin bearer turning up in the queen vic to advise Mick's poorly and much hated Dad? Only the writers will know. You will want to know as soon as Masood is in the clear (of killing off anyone in the square not even saint Jane) and has more than a bit part. Owner has now watched Jamaica Inn and was only slightly annoyed by Mary Yellan's open mouth pose followed by the Tommy cooper drama pronounced EXCELLENT. She was so quiet while she watched it I was able to catch up on some snoozle. her fave joke is the one about the seaside donkeys in Blackpool, he goes what do they get for their lunch? half an hour. boo boom. We love it. And to bring the blog full circle round to the heart thing, he died on stage of a massive heart attack. to look forward to you ask? More silly Enders and perhaps Mick can smoulder on down with those glances followed by hospital capers at Holby City and maybe another dose of Mary Yellan and her chap Jem chasing round the moors. Do go steady out there in the Wold wherever you are in it folks. Big Love Wonka x
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