Saturday, 15 July 2017

All About BERTRUDE X

HOW has your lovely week been folks? full of fun? (TICK) full of angst? (refer to Owner's guide to how to live a full and fun life WHILST beset by angst. First edition.X) OR just full of the usual stuff.  Owner has somehow come through what she describes as a
*&^%$££)___!!!! week.

And it finished with a trip to see the nice Vets with Betrude!
 
 
There she is!! with her brand new VER ex Pensive diabetes.
 
Do you understand Owner, I says up, just out of mild interest folks, DO YOU KNOW what diabetes is??  AM I A CHEMIST Wonka? she snapped back at me saying things like, is it about the liver converting something TO DO WITH GLUCOSE and monitoring and regulating AM I A VET! she goes a bit funny sometimes folks and goodness knows her mouth was a bit lopsided after that visit to the new dentist.  I have to whisper at this point folks incase Owner is listening, but when she fell back in after just ONE filling saying things like I AM NOT SURE if I like him or not (the poor dentist) and how the same person TOLD HER WHAT TO DO.  Now even I folks, after years of practice hesitate when it comes to this - in fact folks, I have found the best way forward is to gently suggest OR advise and then run away. Yes, He TOLD her she is not cleaning her teef (what's left of them) properly AND it was all about damage limitation.  HE SOUNDED like a Police man OR a Lawyer Owner shouted at me, as I say, through half her mouth as the rest of it was frozen up.  I mean.X
 
 
WHAT about Bertrude you all whisper up, concerned she is being left out due to Owner's selfish teef.  Owner has been hard at it, mastering the new insulin pen AND getting over her needle phobia!! You will all wonder if Owner has any phobia's left!! she has (had to) get through the hospital one (thanks to aged parent) the spidder one (thanks to just having to.) and now the needle one!!! Towards the end of the first week of jabbing Bertrude, she suddenly says to me AM I DOING THIS RIGHT and re read the instructions a million times alright four or five. Then she had to take a wee sample for the Vet.  Luckily neither me nor Ruggles used the pretend facilities set up to aid the capture of said wee.  I know.X
 
When she finally got Bertrude stuffed into the carrier and carted off to the Vet he said to increase the dosage and they were back in time for MY teatime. X
 
In other news folks, Owner has been told to take 'a step back' from all the complaining about aged parent supposedly (she says) FOR MY good health.  Between me and you folks I think it is so they can all catch up on the paperwork AND plan their next silly old excuse and apology. Meanwhile, Owner shows no signs of 'stepping back.'  At the beginning of this BUSY BEE week, Owner met a new student who might like some support from her.  Personally I think it ought to be the other way round but who am I? It all went well and Owner only fell out with one teacher who was French and did not make Owner BIEN VENUE! XX
 
Donwald the Trump and Melomenia have wrestled with Macron's hand til you thought it would fall off and Tresa Grey has said she 'shed a tear'.  As Owner was fairly frothing at the mouth about that I caused a distraction by looking at Ruggles who then hissed at me full on.  Distraction is the latest word used about the nasty Brexit on toast talks. NO ONE, and that is PERSONNE can agree or even agree to disagree about what it is, whatever it really is.  and no one knows that either. END of.  FINIT.X
 
To round off this stepping up and down week, Rafa went and got knocked out JUST by a player called Muller. Novak said he was injured and trotted off the court and Murraymint limped off too.  WHICH JUST leaves beloved Federer to bash it out in the Men's singles FINALE!!! we love him.X
 
On the telly, Owner has clung to the LOCH which passeth all understanding so is OK in this housey, and Corrie.  Craigie is challenging the RING of suspects AND this is testing his character!! All about Bethany and if isn't all about her it is all about Aidan and the pretend babee.  In Enders, it is all about the never ending (YAWN says Owner) troup of bully boy girls and thingie and Stephen and Josh.  I know.X
 
Can next week improve on this one folks?? SURELY it can.  Ruggles is eating for ingerland still and hogging the only chair outback AND hissing in my face now and then whilst Bertrude let me go right up and touch noses!! Even if Owner does think it was down to her being dazed and confused just back from the vets.  I did say do you mean yourself Owner but luckily she didn't hear me above shouting for Federer to GET ON WITH IT!!X
 
have a Men's Finals at Wimbledon kind of a week folks and be a Winner!!  Big Love Wonka X