Friday, 15 August 2014

Cool Fridee

Wonka here.  What to report up this good morn?  me and Bertie only scrapped a couple of times in the night.  OH alright three then.  Maybe four, but the good news is Owner barely noticed.  she fell asleep in minutes of trying to read the same sentence over and over.  When it failed to make sense she turned off the light.  and the next thing we knew I was jumping on her feet and avoiding Bertie who was hissing at me from the side of her pillow.  All is back to normal and we love it.

Fresh gone a lot cooler para.  Owner reports that the train from York to Plymouth which says it is a cross country train and stops just about everywhere (give me the name of a town, city or minute village she goes because we stopped in it) was freezing.  I had to put two jumpers on she moaned up and the paccamac on to keep warm coming back and just about stayed above turning blue going down.  Was it the air conditioning I said helpfully.  IT IS NOT WARM ENOUGH, she shouts up, in this country for that!  Owner's friends insisted on trotting round in sleeveless tops and such like whilst Owner was well covered up.  I am glad, I ventured, to hear that the paccamac came in.  You will recall that when Owner purchased this I had recommended it to the armed forces for keeping warm in all conditions.  And dry,  And storm proof.  Owner wore it on many outings and says:  I loved it!

All weathers para.  yesterdee did Owner take the journey to see aged parent who is still languishing in hospital.  It was a fair to middling visit and Owner only swore slightly at some of the drivers on the way home.  Are you taking out your angst (get me) on the other road users I whispered up from well behind the new settee.  it is a bit of a squash now to get behind it but there is a nice new hidey hole to the side of it where I can whisper up in safety.  HE CUT ME UP ON A ROUNDABOUT she squawked back at me and I tell you good folks I am only glad I was not that driver.  You will all want to know were there any other Owner incidents to report and there are.  The main one to report concerns a bag in a sale, in a well known shop that has a name like a watering hole in the desert.  In Plymouth (sorry Plymouth).  Owner made her friends go in there because and I quote:  I love this shop she said.  what happened next you all shout up?  After what seemed like hours, Owner finally selects a lime green clutch bag with a goldy chain thing and a big ticket on it announcing:  I HAVE A FAULTY STRAP.  Despite this Owner still loves it and will buy it.  In the sale.  More to follow.  I love it.

Fresh and breezy para:  continuing our incident of the week.  Owner takes beaut bag to the till where a young lady of fashion model looks starts the long journey into the till and multi explanations that need to go IN THE SYSTEM.  Owner fetches out her credit card ready. I know I know.  All went well until.  (sound of the warning Klaxon) the fashion model in waiting announces that because it is a faulty bag in the sale Owner must not return it.  I DO NOT WANT TO RETURN the bag goes Owner who is still waiting to buy it.  and this is where it all fell to pieces good folk out there thinking AND!  Fashion model said to Owner, she says, I am going to put a red dot on the label in the bag in case you try to return it and ask for your money back.  Owner came to, out of her dream caused by waiting for 5 minutes whilst the fashion model and yet another sharply dressed assistant guided her through the maze of questions on the (computerised folks) till.  I DO NOT WANT A RED DOT IN THE BAG I AM BUYING says Owner.  It turned out, after fetching the Manager which makes it three fashion models at the till, that Owner must have a red dot in her bag.  Then what happened says I?  The Manager started on a long explanation of why I must have a red dot on the label and I simply shoved the bag at her, told my friends we were leaving and left, she goes.  Another non essential expense scuppered (ooh!!)  and I love it!  so our cartoon today is all about this very bag:
 
There it is!  Owner trying to buy the lime green bag sans dot!!  which simply means without and any of our beloved French folk will know.  I love it.
 
Final warmed up a bit para.  Owner has been to the shops for more essential supplies and no incidents worthy of reporting up (that's what she says now).  Tonight we have the bliss of Corrie x 2 and if Owner remains in a calm state I may suggest Enders just to see if we can catch up after a week.  I say we can.  No Owner has still not put that film on I asked for.   I know.  We searched half heartedly for a good programme last night and hit ZERO.  all we could find was Location etc and these couples bowling round houses going I LIKE IT or, mumble mumble car park, small garden with Phil being overruled by thingy.  We have finally got to the end of another strenuous week folks, and I only hope you have got by.  I must dash as (list) 1.  Ruggles is on the good back door step asleep despite the noise from our neighbours yard and may want feeding 2.  I have not checked on Bertie for ages and 3.  I thought I heard Owner mention getting the monster out of the Narnia cupboard.  do go steady out there in the Wold wherever you are in it.  Big Love Wonka x